Working it out in my head

Because I don’t know him, my mind is tempted to make assumptions.

Truth is, even if I did "know" him, I might still be tempted to make assumptions.

The danger in making assumptions is the temptation to treat the assumptions as fact as opposed to conjectures cobbled together in an attempt to have a clear point of view on a subject.

I am trying not to judge P__ but I can’t help but notice that other people at the gym initiate saying hello. There’s one guy who will tap me on the shoulder if I don’t happen to see him first and there’s another one who will come by and engage me in conversation. I feel as though if I don’t initiate with P__, it won’t happen...

I know it’s not fair to compare him to others. If I compare him, I may find him guilty and that’s not fair since all I have is my subjective point of view. So perhaps instead of comparing him, I can use this as an opportunity to clarify more of what I want.

I’m interested in meeting people who are available—literally and figuratively. I want to meet people who take the time to initiate conversation and show interest in wanting to connect in a healthy and fun verbal exchange. I expect that in all existing and in all potential relationships—friendship or otherwise.

As for genuine, empowering, spiritually grounded love, I subscibe quite strongly to Anna Louise Strong's quote, "To fall in love is easy, even to remain in it is not difficult; our human loneliness is cause enough. But it is a hard quest worth making to find a comrade through whose steady presence one becomes steadily the person one desires to be."

In the interim, Dear God, please heal my perception of P___. I ask you to help me in truly surrendering and fully releasing him. Since my personal desire is peace and happiness, I honestly wish him the same-- true peace and every happiness. You have my best interest at heart and so I trust your direction in all my affairs. I am genuinely only interested in what and in whom you want to bring into my life.
Please heal my perception, help me come from a place of love and help me to hear your council.

Thank you.

Amen.