Sharing Poetry Unbound episode: Yehuda Amichai’s poem “The Place Where We Are Right,” translated by Stephen Mitchell

A line that stood out to me in Pádraig Ó Tuama‘s reflection on this poem is, “Are there victims to the way that I think that I’m right?” I think the line would have struck me anyways, but after recently being on the receiving end of an interaction with someone who thought they were right about something involving me and were actually very wrong, the question has me replaying the interaction, while cautioning me to think about where I might be doing this to someone else.

 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/poetry-unbound/id1492928827?i=1000655885477

Sharing from Andrea Gibson

https://andreagibson.substack.com/p/overcoming-anxiety-lessons-from-surfing?utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=email-restack-comment&r=1thv6n&triedRedirect=true

Two Experiences from the Other Day

The other day, two experiences made me smile: 

1) While waiting in the pharmacy line for an extended period of time, my gaze wandered, landing on a little brown-skinned child. Possibly 18 months to 2 years old, donning a white top and a tiered dark pink ruffled skirt (or it may have been a dress, I couldn’t tell from where I stood), it was paired with sparkly shoes that lit up as she clumped-stomped in the way little ones do in the advent of their walking adventures. Initially traveling in front of her guardian, it appears the latter called for her because the little one turned, then waddled-teetered back to place her tiny hand into the outstretched larger one. Together, they continued their journey to the exit. And with every step she took, her shoes sparkled, her skirt swayed like a bell from side to side, and I beamed. 

2) When I got home, another young child, this time a little boy, possibly of Eritrean, Ethiopian, or Somalian ancestry, possibly 4 years of age, rode by on his scooter. “Hi!” He called out, coupling it with a smile. Charmed by the bright, enthusiastic greeting, I responded in kind. Immediately, he asked, “Did you see my scooter?” Surprised, this took me a second to comprehend, but when I did, I told him it was an awesome looking scooter. Seemingly satisfied by this response, I ceased to exist as he turned and, meticulously, rolled away on said scooter. I had the impression that he may have recently acquired it, and that had me grinning. I imagined he liked it so much that he had to bring it to my attention :) I mean, it was a nice looking scooter 😁

Hope your day is visited by smiles and laughter, and you allow yourself the pleasure of their company 😊 Cheering. You. On. 💚🌱😊 

Thoughts on Shaming

Sharing a summary of thoughts from a chat convo with a friend on the subject of shaming:

Shaming is a huge blind spot for people. It’s been accepted for so long—normalized and internalized—that, sometimes, it’s hard to recognize when you’re engaging in it, when someone else is engaging in it, or when you’re the recipient of it—especially from yourself to yourself. To start the work of addressing it, one can only begin with the decision to gently notice and then keep making conscious decisions and taking conscious actions to flip that script from one of judgment to one of compassion. 

Wishes for the Day (any day that you happen to read this)

Wishing you experiences of joy, inner peace, grace and insights today. Hoping your heart and your spirit is touched in beautiful and profound ways. And if any moments of the day calls for inner strength, patience, and perseverance, I pray that you may connect with everything that helps to make it possible. Take gentle and loving care. Cheering. You. On.

Whenever possible, Speak up

Whenever it is possible, speak up when you know it contributes to taking kind and gentle care of you.

 

A: So, should we go to X, then Y, and then Z?

B (voice dialed up to blaring): We’re going to X first.

A: Please don’t yell at me.

B: We already went over this. You shouldn’t have to ask again.

A: Please don’t yell at me. There are times when I go over things with you more than once.

B replies in a way that shows nothing A says will change B’s perspective.

A: Please don’t yell at me.

B mutters a slew of things that still imply A is wrong.

 

A is upset but silent, as A has said what was important for A to say. A is also aware that B’s behavior is born out of how they were raised, trauma from the high bar of expectation that is perfectionism, and the lenses through which B views A in particular. A understands. A is truly grateful to be in a position to understand. This helps A to continue working at not taking it personally. But A also understands the need to address what feels unacceptable to their spirit: yelling and shaming in response to asking a question.

 

Speak up when you know it contributes to taking kind and gentle care of you. Sometimes it isn't possible. But when you are able, whenever it is possible, speak up. You might not change the other person’s behavior, but you will continue in playing your part in taking loving care of you. 

Cheering. You. On🌱💚

Gelato

Dear Reader,

Yesterday, I went to the store and, amongst other things, window-shopped in the gelato aisle.

When I got home, how many times do you think I thought about gelato? The answer is, "More than I would've if I'd just gotten some gelato in the first place."

Today, I went to the store and, amongst other things, bought some gelato.

Dear Reader, thus far, this is easily on my list of top ten best decisions of 2024.  

When A Child Walks Into the Room...Do Your Eyes Light Up? - Toni Morrison

I loved reading this. 

A child, an adult, someone you know, perhaps an acquaintance, maybe even a stranger... People can feel the energy you’re radiating in person or via your tone over the phone. When I first read the piece that included this quote, memories came to mind, thereby cementing the truth of this statement by Toni Morrison. Ever since, I have tried, particularly with children, to let them know I’m elated to see them when they come into a room.

All the best with your day, folks, and with the brand new shiny month. May you feel seen and valued when you walk into a room and, in turn, may your energy do the same for others. Cheering. You. On.

https://brenebrown.com/articles/2019/08/07/what-toni-morrison-taught-me-about-parenting/?fbclid=IwAR1qJkzOo_-bdVy0zcUAuHUZfdnlo9gUdeMvvnZB63YgpGPsdZYD2FdbB9k 

Thank you for the reminder, K.K.

people who have experienced deep suffering

and are still gentle with others

do not get enough credit

to not let the hard things

that happened to you win is heroic work,

to drop the bitterness

and still live with an open heart

despite it all

is a massive gift to the world

                            - Yung Pueblo/ Diego Perez 

Thank you for your comment on my Facebook post from a few weeks ago, the post with the quote by Yung Pueblo. 

The quote about the people who have been through the hard but still find a way to keep their hearts open and how it’s a gift to the world. Your comment said you saw this in me. 

Honestly? My first thought was, no, not me. No, this quote is about those who have been through the epic. But then I remembered that I had a front-row seat to all the times an emotional experience grabbed the spotlight of my attention. I remembered how I’d call out to the Folks Upstairs, crying or raging as I starred in my own personal Greek tragedy, bent like Atlas under the weight of emotions and, unlike Elsa, unable to let it go, let it go, unable to process it differently in the moment of the unfolding, thereby making those experiences feel astoundingly epic.

And then I thought, okay. Maybe I have had my experiences of the epic. But I can get so caught up. You don’t see the times when the anger or bitterness or sadness of an interaction has me by the throat, cutting off access to breath from my heart, making it difficult to reach for that light of forgiveness and grace and compassion and all the words that would lead me back to love and wanting to love. 

And then, I looked back at the quote, still trying to justify my perception that it still couldn’t include me, couldn’t count me among those in its dictionary of examples the way you thought it did. Do you know what happened when I looked at the quote? I spent more time on the words, "drop the bitterness."  I had missed the importance of the word “drop.” To drop. As in, to let go of something once held, acknowledging the decision to do so, and resulting in the action of release.

And then, I looked at your comment again and realized that 1) in my reaction to it, I was diminishing my light and 2) because you took the time to share what you saw, I looked again and I could now see what you saw, I could now see what I had glossed over before. I was forgetting that when struggling in the dark night of emotions, I always found a way, eventually, to get hold of a flashlight. Thanks to your comment, I remembered that all those times I was caught in the thunderstorm of a life experience, a part of me eventually, no matter the circumstances, always wanted to find and therefore found my way back to reaching for that flashlight, imploring the company of Heaven as I stumbled in the metaphorical wet and the slippery for help with turning on that light. Thanks to your comment, I remembered that I always asked for help, no matter how long it took for me to ask, with moving through the power outage until the electricity returned. 

So, I wanted to thank you for your comment. Thank you for taking the time to share it. Thank you for helping me to see me and in the seeing, value me a bit more consciously.

 

Do You See a Face In the Sky? I Do

 

Wellness Check from You Better Be Lightning by Andrea Gibson

 

Self work Quote from Michell Clark

 

A Reminder from wheresmollie

 

Dear You, Last Year, Dear You, This Year

At some points in the last 360+ days:

You made space for new beginnings.

You said, “Hello.” You said, “Goodbye.” Sometimes literally, sometimes energetically. And even when it was the right choice for you to make, sometimes it was just plain north of hard. But you did it.

You noticed signs and made more conscious choices, endeavoring to make deposits into the banks of self-love, self-care, and mental and emotional well-being.

You treated yourself with grace, kindness, and compassion. You treated others with grace, kindness, and compassion. Or you kept/ keep working on it. Which counts too.

You allowed yourself space to feel your feels, and practiced not shaming yourself for doing so (Gold Star!). Then, afterwards, you found a way to keep moving forward.

Your literal presence made a difference in someone else’s experience of their day. Therefore, at the very least, you basically left your unique fingerprint on their journey (the kind that will never, ever rub off).

You allowed others to touch your heart.

You bravely asked for help.

You had audacity for breakfast, set some wheels into motion, and plan on doing so again.

You paid attention to your inner child and showed up for yourself. You made tough decisions and gently (sometimes fiercely) had your back.

You spoke up. Sometimes immediately. Sometimes hours later, like after a rather persistent inner voice kept tugging on the sleeve of your attention to say, “Dude, Bruh, Hey, Yo,” relentlessly, until you listened.

You allowed your heart to care, and to continue caring.

In 2024, I wish you all of this again, and better.

A plethora of blessings on you and on your new year to come. And throughout the easy and throughout the hard, with love, I will always be Cheering. You. On.