Sunday, August 19, 2018

Exchange Inspired by N.S.’ story in W.E. — the story of S&T (8/19/18)


“But how do you know when a person is ‘the one?’” She asked, hands held up in quotations just seconds before falling to her lap.

Her Aunt smiled her secret smile. “Sometimes, you just know.”

Silence filled the room while she pondered her next question.

Then tentatively, because, even though she was only in her 11th year of life, an innate knowing often counseled, as it did now, and she listened and knew that some subjects required a gentle approach. “Are you ever sad you haven’t met your ‘one?’”

“I used to be— just ask your mother,” Aunty replied quirking her brow in amusement. “When she met your father, she knew— and it was doubly good news for her since that meant she was no longer enrolled in Mama’s impromptu ‘I Want Grandchildren’ Lectures. With my little sister graduating, your grandmama could now focus all of her attention on me. And I was so thrilled.”  Aunty deadpanned, and her audience of one erupted into giggles.


A beat later, adopting a more affectionate tone, she continued.  “No, I was thrilled for your mother.  And at the same time it was hard for me.  But then, as is sometimes the case with the passage of time coupled with a determination of spirit, I decided I could either focus on the hard or find a way to thrive.  So, I worked on trusting that if it was meant to happen for me, then it would. And in the interim, I could simply be happy for all those for whom it did happen.”


Tuesday, August 14, 2018

i love you so much


I love you so much.

I love you so much it’s instinctive to give you solutions masked as advice on how to navigate issues you bring to my attention unfolding in your life.  I’m younger, yes, but I like to think I’m an old soul and so the advice I proffer carries a bit more weight

I love you so much I offer advice when something has happened as opposed to the advice you offer seemingly out of the blue but actually is more akin to a well-known tune because I’ve heard it over and over and over again throughout the years

I love you so much I’m so heart sad to know my life is lacking on some level to you.
I love you so much I allow all I can allow until enough is enough and I have no other defense but to say, “Stop!” and walk away

I love you so much I do the inner work to understand why you say what you say because it helps me to forgive, widens my compassion and teaches me what not to perpetuate

I love you so much I’m trying to figure out how to let you be you while being my best self even though letting you be you sometimes affects me being my best self

I love you so much I hope both of our dreams come through for my life in all ways that makes both parties so very happy

I love you so much I’m consistently asking for divine assistance on surrendering our relationship, consistently asking for divine guidance on how best to proceed